Hurted. That’s what I’m feeling right now.
You know how does it feels like when there is that moment when something happen and you know it happen but people around you don’t because they don’t get enough evidence to proof it and they started to judge you for telling a lie when you swear that it really did happen?
Maybe you don’t.
But I do.
You try keep it inside your head but you just can’t.
Everybody needs someone to be there to support them.
and I do too.
I’m not a superhero who can always be there for people who needs me. I’m just a human who can be as fragile as mimosa.
one blow and I’ll be gone with the wind.
Then what did I do?
I can’t tell anyone about anything because the blame will always be on me.
That’s just the best escape.
Sometimes people cry with or without reason. Maybe they are overwhelmed by happiness or they are grieving.
You can’t tell the difference unless you know the situation.
So here I am, on the corner of the room, crying the whole new tissue box out until it’s empty. I scream under my pillow and try to drown myself on the bath tub.
No one will know.
No one even care.
because from the beginning I am already alone and I will always be.
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© 2016 Litania Zhou